Taming the Beast Commonly known as the Tongue!

"Do not let unwholesome talk come out of your mouths but only what is helpful in building others up, according to their needs that it may benefit those who listen." Ephesians 4:29



I recently heard about a new trend among young pastors just finishing up seminary and finding congregations to which they feel called to minister. The trend is nothing short of shocking and disturbing and is absolutely contrary to the Word. Apparently a new movement has come about where these young pastors want to seem real to the congregation. Seems harmless enough, right? Well, here's the clincher: In a very human effort to appear real, they've decided it is necessary to use foul, coarse language from the pulpit. They've decided that because we're under God's grace, it's fine to just let it slip at random when addressing the congregation. Unfortunately, they seem to be overlooking what scripture tells us in the midst of this human attempt. This movement has no regard for the warning we're given in Romans 12:1-2. The bottom line is this can be confusing to nonbelievers and those new to the faith as well. The only way to clear any confusion is to always trust the Word and what it says. It doesn't lie and will give you the clarity on such untruths each and every time.

I shook my head in amazement when I heard about that trend and then thought about how prevalent unwholesome talk is on a smaller scale in our lives. Ladies, we're the worst. I can't begin to count the number of times where I've walked into a room where a group of women were gathered in faint whispers and grew quiet when I approached or when the person who was the topic of conversation entered the room. It was painfully obvious there was gossip in the midst. Whether the person in question was me or someone else, it was awkward and unnecessary.

We're all guilty of saying things we wish we could take back. Sometimes we're gonna say things we shouldn't. But far too many of us make it a habit and even incite others to join in the gossip and tearing down of others. If you struggle with it, consider the following before opening your mouth: 1) Is what you're about to say unwholesome? Is is coarse? Does it have the propensity to hurt another whether true or untrue? 2) Does it build others up? Is it encouraging? and 3) Will your listeners benefit from what you're about to say? If your answer is "no" to those questions, then put a lid on it! If you struggle with letting things fly, ask the Holy Spirit to convict you each time you're about to say something you shouldn't. While the saying "Actions speak louder than words" is very true, words stick with us. Your coarse language may be overheard by vulnerable ears and your gossip can emotionally scar someone for life.

Strive to be a light to others. Strive to be a person where people feel comfortable confiding in you. Be a woman where others know they can come to you for advice and they won't be put down, slandered or betrayed. If you're that woman, you're pleasing in the sight of the Lord. Why? Because you're representative of Jesus. You're demonstrating love for others when you refuse to have any part in gossip. You're showing maturity when you see the futility in coarse talk. You're exuding the character of God.

So, I have a challenge for you, the next time you're tempted to use coarse language or speak poorly of someone else, find something positive to say instead. In place of foul language, quote scripture. In place of gossip, ask God to show you something kind you can say about them. Replace the negative with positive. The more you do this, the more aware you'll become of the habit. It will no longer be a habit because you'll be convicted each time the opportunity arises.

There's a tremendous amount of power in your tongue. You have to make the decision as to whether you will choose that power from God or from the enemy. Remember this: When you make conscious decisions on a regular basis to contradict scripture with your words and actions, you're at enmity with God. That means you're choosing to be His enemy with your choices. That's a heavy thought, but necessary.

Heavenly Father, I know there have been times in my life where I've hurt others with my words. Please convict me and reveal them to me that I may repent and ask your forgiveness and then go to the person I offended and ask forgiveness. Father, you want us to live peaceably with each other. We are not to be slanderers or loose-tongued. I pray that we would seek to be women above reproach. I pray that unsaved women reading this would understand clearly that the power of which I speak comes solely from You. Father, help them to have a desire to know you personally. For we know we can never be pleasing to You if we never know you personally and you won't accept us if we choose to ignore the call to be in a relstionship with You. And Father, for those who know you but choose to be loose-tongued, please help them to seek wisdom from You in choosing their words carefully. Help us to have a desire to be pleasing to You. Help us to remain mindful of the impact our words have on others. Thank you, Father. We thank you for your forgiveness where we fail. But we ask you to grow us so that we won't willfully sin because of your forgiveness. Please give us a broken heart when we fail you with our words and actions and make it our pure desire to please you. In Jesus' precious name, Amen.